First day. Check check.. 1.2.3..4..

September 16, 2008

This will likely be pretty brief. I’m very tired and want to curl up on my bed and study.

So, wow, so much to write and impossible to fit it all in. Yesterday we started with orientation, followed by a welcome dinner. It was all very nice. We met the staff, got signed in, given the down low on rules and shuffled off to bed. This morning was a late morning with more orientation, and then we met Bikram. He talked to us for about an hour. So much about Bikram, far more than I can say here. I am sure as the weeks go on, I will have a lot to say. He’s immediately engaging, outrageous, and hilarious. We then had lunch, another session of more orientation and then a break to prepare for class.

Oy..

They’ve been telling us, “take it easy honey.” The first week is NOT about killing yourself or proving yourself to anyone. The first week is about not passing out and acclimating to the overwhelming humidity, the room, the heat, and the new environment. That said, I can see now why they warn us so much. It’s hard to not push and not want to go for it. But I did take it easy tonight and I’m glad. By about Standing Bow my body had taken over that decision and I was taking small breaks. I had some shaky legs, some nausea, and LOTS of dizziness. Nothing that forced me to leave my mat or anything like that, but not very fun either. The Standing Series was much harder for me than the Floor Series. I got very discouraged and thought many many times to myself, “I can’t do this! Why am I here?? What was I thinking??” By Savasana (midpoint rest) I was crying. I wanted to run, I wanted to scream, I wanted OUT OF THE FUCKING ROOM!!! But I didn’t go, I stayed, and I was glad for it. The room is so big, and so overwhelming. Just staring at the ceiling tiles can make you feel like you are going to fall over. I didn’t, but I felt like I might. Ahhh my FIRST breakdown, YAYYYY it’s OVER! But somewhere around Locust I was fine, happy, laughing at the Boss man, doing both sets. I finished class fine, and was smiling by the end. I even had water left in my bottle.

I’m going to be fine. I am.

I stayed in the room. Right? Goal number one. I stayed in the room.

Anyway, I’ve been a little up and a little down today.  Raj said last night everyone experiences the breakdown, everyone will have this happen.  Some will have it now, some will have it in the middle, some will have it later.  Some will have it the whole time.  I miss my family.  I miss them so much, and have no idea how they’re doing with this horrible situation in Houston.  I can’t get to them, I can’t.  It’s maddening.

But, I am here.  I am here and the only way I can bere here is to just be here.  They’ve been telling us to just be here.  Be here now.  I’m trying.

Tomorrow morning starts with another class with Bikram.  I’m looking forward to having a real day here with two full classes and posture clinic.  I am itching to give my dialogue for Half Moon.  Get it over with!!!

I will write again as I can.  Love to you all.

Here’s a quick look at the room tonight just before class.

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7 Responses to “First day. Check check.. 1.2.3..4..”

  1. Kevin Leary Says:

    Thanks for doing this. I do Bikram in NYC. My sister is there at teacher training. Now I can get the feeling.


  2. Really enjoying reading about your experience there. I love that you are “being” and working through your struggles to NOT be. Keep it up and you will be better for it in the long run.

  3. Michelle Says:

    YOU STAYED IN THE ROOM.

    You rock!

    Week 1….off you go!

  4. Alicia Woolen Says:

    I am so thrilled for you! Way to go! You stayed in the room! I love following your blog…this is going to be fun hearing all about training! I can’t wait to take one of your classes at BYTW! Take care.

    Alicia

  5. Michelle Says:

    Yoga girl! I still don’t have power and will be awhile, Woodlands are getting back to living(studio still not open, bummmer) Generator is humming in my back yard! I’m so tired of camping 🙂

  6. Cisco Says:

    and so it starts….
    stick with it.

  7. Aya Says:

    I am so excited for you!Yes, you stayed in the room and that’s what counts. I am so happy that you are going to share your teacher training experience and am very grateful to you. Keep it up!Sending you positive energy.


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